i can graduate?

so as promised, i am back to give a REAL update (although time wise, its much later than the previous post...hahaha)

hmm...where to start...

so earlier this semester, i had a post about feeling out of place because this past semester was my 5th year in college. also, this was the first year i was living in an apartment with people i didn't really know. on top of that, the closest people i knew/had were either gone (graduated) or far away (lived off campus) although off campus people were still pretty close, it just wasn't as close walking over to the next room or the next apartment. so finding a community that i can really place my self in became a challenge. But with God's AWESOMENESS, i was able to challenge myself to build new friendships and also mature friendships that i had and surround myself in a new community of people. not that i have replaced my old community, but i've been given the privilege to EXPAND my community.

another issue i've been rambling about this past semester is getting off my butt and getting my act together for school. i'd have to admit that this semester, i was definitely still not to par with the work ethic i had back in high school, but i was able to get my act together nevertheless. although i cant say for sure i can graduate (cuz i dont wana jinx myself) im pretty sure i will graduate next spring...yay!!! finally x] also, this past semester, i was able to pass the class i needed for my music degree and pull off a 3.82 for my semester GPA...w00t w00t!!!

oh, for those of you that are curious about my future...it looks like as of now, IV staff isn't my calling. will it be later? i don't know. but after much prayer and discussion with some wise people, i think that God is leading me in another direction from IV staff (although i'll admit that i would LOVE to do it) its just not for me right now. so what then you ask? well, as of now, i know i really want to do something musically related. i really feel like God has given me music as a gift to serve Him. how that looks like, im still not too sure. but a suggestion i was given was to apply for some kind of internship/job to be a worship/music coordinator for a church. so with that in mind, i asked my dad about the possibility of working at OCM...haha...weird right? and then i kinda gave a shpiel on what i feel like i could contribute (it felt like an interview...over the dinner table -_-) and to my surprise, my dad acutally liked my ideas and told me to apply and see if church would actually hire me. and to my OWN surprise, i was actually kinda excited about it. so i guess for the people that read this, please pray for me and my future. where God will lead me (whether in OCM or somewhere else) and for the opportunity to serve God in this manner.

speaking of my future, those "major" changes that i've been talking about recently...its all coming to life-ish. so with the whole finding community thingy, i was able spend a good amount of time alone by myself. thinking, praying, and just figuring out things with God. but yeah, although there's still a LOT of things that are still on my mind, something i was able to let go to God is my anxiety of my future. the past 2 years has been a complete change and extremely painful growth for me. but through all that change, God was able to pull me through and give me an opportunity of a lifetime. to totally surrender to Him the anxiety about dating/relationships. how thats gona look like, i have NO clue or even the slightest idea. but i know that im in the hands of a God that LOVES me and He knows who/what/when/where/why and how its going to happen and i know that its going to be what is BEST for me.

i guess this post wasn't as complete as i wanted it to be, but its getting really late for serious and i can't seem to write anything coherent anymore (that last paragraph took me like 30 mins)

so with that, i will end this post and wish everyone that reads this a


Merry Christmas

g-nite-0 peeps